Nanay Lydia, as we all call her regardless of our affinity, passed away on December 10. We were all shocked and saddened. We never expected that it would happen too soon. Nanay was ready, she knew it was coming but we are not. As what daddy said, our lives will no longer be whole again but we all need to move on - for the sake of our children.
When I decided to try my luck in Singapore in February, Nanay Lydia insisted on taking care of Mariel in Pangasinan even when she was recovering from stroke. When she learned that Mariel is deaf, she cried but bravely told me that Mariel is still lucky because she could be the next Jamilla (PBB?) and that everybody loves her.
LAst October, she was diagnosed with heart enlargement, peptic ulcer and gallstones. She was already being monitored for her type 2 diabetes, hypertension and possible complications when she had stroke. Nanay was static when she learned that Mama Lita and Jade are coming home in March 2009 but she kept on saying that "baka hindi na tayo magkita kung March pa kayo uuwi". So Mama decided to come home earlier. Nanay was so excited and said "Sasama ako sa pagsundo." Mom and Jade arrived in Manila on October 16, Nanay Lydia was even here to fetch them in NAIA.
Nanay was in and out of the hospital since October. On the second week of November, her cardiologist decided to let her go home with the IV. Our uncles and aunties just asked nurses in our village to inject pain reliever when she experienced gallstone attack.
I just know how painful it was to be inserted IV over and over again. Plus the pain inside the abdomen radiating to the lover right portion of shoulder. Perhaps the pain caused nanay cardiogenic shock. The doctors said it was her heart that caused her life.
It was easier for us to let go of Nanay because we don't wanna see her go through those painful symptoms and medical processes. We were in denial at first, we tried to argue and blame ourselves but we also tried to gather strength from each other. We cried and cried...we hugged and cried on each others shoulders.
It was devastating...it was painful. As mama had said, "Nanay is no longer here, the one who holds the bond among us." Nanay is such a wonderful grandmom to me. She was the one who took care of me and Ranny. She may no longer be with us physically but what she taught us will forever be in us.
We love you Nanay. Thank you for everything. I am not what I am now if not because of you. You did not only teach me how to live but also how to touch other people's lives the way you did to other people. I love you so much.
